Once a Manpower Officer, Melvin Lee now finds purpose at gentleHelp by helping families and domestic helpers find their perfect fit in Singapore.
“One of the most important lessons I learnt in the army had nothing to do with weapons, drills or strategy. It was about people. Early in my career as a Manpower Officer, I would sit across from young servicemen who had just been posted into my unit.
Some were nervous. Some were defensive. Others carried personal struggles they had never shared with anyone. My job was to understand them quickly. Who they were, what they were capable of, and where they would function best.
At the time, I thought I was simply doing routine manpower work. Years later, I realised those conversations were preparing me for something completely different. Today, instead of matching servicemen to military units, I help families in Singapore find the right domestic helper for their homes. Different environment; same principle.”
Growing up with a sense of responsibility
“I grew up in a hawker family. Some of my earliest memories are of watching my father work long hours at the stall. The work was physically demanding, but he rarely complained. Seeing that up close instilled in me a strong sense of responsibility from a young age.
When I enlisted in the Singapore Armed Forces (SAF) in 2012, I did not see it only as national service. I saw it as an opportunity to build stability for my family and myself, and to grow into someone capable of taking responsibility for others.
The army later sponsored my studies at Singapore Management University, where I pursued a Bachelor of Science in Information Systems. Over the next decade, the SAF became more than a workplace. It was where I grew and learnt what leadership truly meant.”
Caring for people as a commander in the army
“What kept me grounded as a senior commander was simple. A genuine care for people. Some servicemen were difficult to manage. Still, I stayed patient, made time to listen and tried to meet them where they were as individuals.
Most did not change overnight. But when their service ended, many returned to thank me. They did not thank me for what I knew. They thanked me for caring. That shaped a belief I carry with me today. People do not care how much you know until they know that you care.”
The power of believing in people
“During my 11 years in the army, I served in both manpower and logistics roles. Each week, I interviewed five to 10 recruits and assessed where they might best fit within the unit. Sometimes placements worked immediately. Other times, they did not.
A serviceman might struggle in one environment but thrive in another. When that happened, my role was to step in, listen, counsel and help find a better fit. One case that has stayed with me involved a serviceman in my unit who had gone AWOL.
The protocol required house visits, but each time I visited, I faced his distraught mother who saw us as the enemy. When he was eventually caught, she blamed me personally. But I continued visiting him, and encouraged him to think about his mother and his life choices.
At times, it felt like my words made little difference. Nearly a year later, I received a call from his mother. This time, she was not calling to scold me. She called to thank me. After serving his punishment, she said her son had changed.
He had become kinder, more loving and appreciative of his family. That moment stayed with me. The army demands discipline, but discipline without empathy can break people. I believe no one is born bad. Many people are simply waiting for someone to believe in them.”
The question that changed my path
“Toward the end of my scholarship bond with SAF, I was offered a promotion to Major. I declined and remained a Captain. It was a milestone I had worked hard for, especially at the age of 31.
But around that time, I began asking myself a difficult question. How would I fare in the civilian world? The army had been my entire professional life. It gave me structure and stability. Yet, a part of me was curious about what I could build outside of it.
Leaving was not easy. It meant taking a significant pay cut and stepping into uncertainty. My wife was also expecting our son just one month after I left the SAF. For a while, the future felt uncertain. But it also felt like the start of something new.”
Finding new purpose in the domestic helper industry
“My entry into the domestic helper industry was not something I had planned. After a brief and unsuccessful stint in the renovation sector, two long-time friends, Pehyu and Chloe, reached out. They had started a maid agency and believed the industry needed change.
In Singapore, many families depend on domestic helpers to care for young children, ageing parents or loved ones with special needs. Yet, hiring and managing a helper can be overwhelming. If we could improve that experience, the impact would be meaningful.”
Realising the work is still about people
“I joined the gentleHelp team in July 2025. At first, I had my doubts. I was moving from a structured military environment into a completely different industry. But as I began speaking with employers and helpers, the work started to feel familiar.
In the army, I matched servicemen to units. Today, I help match helpers to households. The same principle still applies – listen carefully, understand each person’s circumstances, and recognise that environment often shapes outcomes more than ability alone.”
Fighting stigma in the domestic helper industry
“I saw this clearly in one case involving a transfer helper. Transfer helpers often carry an unfair stigma. Many assume that if a helper is transferred, it means she has already failed. I disagree.
A close friend who was looking for a helper was open to giving a transfer candidate a second chance. I did not expect much, but their feedback surprised me. The helper turned out to be an excellent cook, warm with the children and someone the family quickly grew to rely on.
She was thriving in her new household and performing far better than she had in her previous placement. That experience reinforced something I believe strongly. A poor fit is not the same as poor capability.
Too often, people are judged too quickly. The better question is this: where does this person shine, and how do we create the environment for them to succeed?”
A different kind of service
“Today, I oversee operations and marketing at gentleHelp, managing placements and improving systems that help families navigate the hiring process. But one lesson from the army continues to guide me: good systems should reduce people’s burdens, not add to them.
Technology should support human judgment, not replace empathy. Because ultimately, this work is not just about placing people in jobs. It is about helping households function better.
Looking back, I realised something. The mission never really changed. In the army, my responsibility was to support soldiers and ensure units worked well together. Today, my responsibility is to support families and help households run smoothly.
Different setting. Different uniform. But the same principle still guides me every day. Talk less. Listen more. And remember that behind every decision, there are people who may simply need a little gentle help.” – Melvin Lee
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